New Blog theme wut wut.
And I’m down 8 pounds in less than 14 days.

4 months ago I remember saying my life was perfect. I was so happy.

Today my dad is dead. He actually became ashes yesterday…. And I’m so sad.


My daddy passed away at home on Friday evening, 6/7, before 9pm. It was very horrific and completely unexpected. He appeared to be sleeping sitting up on the couch as usual, but something looked amiss. He has been sick which cirrhosis of the liver for over two years. He had a minor outpatient procedure that morning and got home around 2pm. He went to sleep on and off the rest of the day.

Currently family from all over has been flocking here. I’ve been a mess.

My daddy is on the right, my aunt Elizabeth in the middle, and my uncle Mike on the left.
I love you daddy.

Oh you don’t want to live with me anymore? You’re over it?
Thanks for waiting until summer to tell me. Now I’ll have a hard time finding an apartment or a room. Fucking asshole that apparently has no concern for me.

I am livid.

My dad is dying and I don’t know what to do. How can there be a world in which he doesn’t exist? He’s been there from the beginning, he’s a vital part of my world and I love him and need him. This impending loss is draining. I wish I could spend every moment with him. Sometimes I am overwhelmed with sadness and just sob. Thank god for Trevor.

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